Have you ever had one of those weeks when you have ever been knocked down or kicked around by life and had just about had enough?? You feel like everything you do just isn’t good enough?  

This was such a week for me! I was struggling with my confidence at work and feeling inadequate. I questioned everything I did and wasn’t even sure why I was even there. So I prayed about it and did my best to stand in my faith, but then something wonderful happened to me!

Yesterday I had the most vulnerable (honest) conversation with another single mom as our sons were at soccer practice. We have been friends for years but it was one of the best talks we have ever had. It had been a very difficult week at work for me and God knew that I needed to be encouraged and probably that she did too.  Today as I write this I still marvel at how both our needs were met by this seemingly simple conversation.

It was so unexpected. I walked over to say hi and she jumped out of her car. We gave each other a hug and I just asked her how her week was. (I knew how crummy mines was but I made it about her.) That simple question allowed us to engage in one of the best and most honest conversations we have had.

Our story: We both were widowed young, our sons are about the same age and over the years have been on a similar journey. We talked about our support systems, dating, setting examples for our children, finding balance and the importance of feeling good about ourselves. We both reflected on our journeys and how sometimes we didn’t know how we overcame a circumstance, but through our faith, we felt God’s favor and grace in our lives. We discussed how sometimes we made mistakes along the way. We marveled how there was nothing that happened in our lives that wasn’t a great lesson and how much wiser we were for it. We both felt that the key is to continue to believe in yourself and love yourself and know that you are on a journey and everything that happens is part of the path that God wants you to take. I went home feeling happy, refreshed, rejuvenated and so much more confident. No more feeling sorry for myself because my life is so rich and I am so blessed!

Do you sometimes feel sorry for yourself or that you are not good enough? We all do sometimes. It’s part of the human condition. Sometimes life can really kick you around. The key is to develop strategies that will help you to move from this condition to knowing who you are and standing in your power. For me it is my faith, for someone else it is working out and still for others it is something else. Here are some good reminders when you are feeling like you are not good enough.

1. Decide that you are, and believe it.  This sounds too simplistic, but it is true. Make a decision that you are good enough and believe it no matter what anyone says. You alone have the power inside you to control your thoughts, which control your actions.

2. Evaluate failures as opportunities for success. If you didn’t do something quite as well as you expected, don’t beat yourself up. Use the failure as an opportunity to improve and grow. Evaluate what you did wrong and prepare for future success. Yes failure feels terrible, but without it there is also no great success. You appreciate it so much more if it doesn’t come easy.

3. Celebrate your successes. Sometimes we don’t take the time to even recognize when we do something good. We may be caught up in the trap of even though it was good, it can be better. Don’t be one of these people who is never satisfied. Be able to recognize and appreciate your achievements. Let each success catapult you to strive more and be the best you can be.  Don’t be a perfectionist.  Perfectionism is one of the great human flaws that gets rewarded in our society.  There is no such concept in the human condition. No one is perfect except God. Once you realize that you can relax and enjoy yourself.

4. Put energy on serving others. This is the most important point. Your life is not just about you, but you are here to use your talents and gifts to enhance the lives of those around you. If you put your energy on using your life to serve others, I have found that you feel useful and rewarded. You can’t help but feel better because you haven’t made it all about you. You can’t have a pity party when you are using your life to serve others. Notice how good you feel when you volunteer to help others?

Before I go I want to introduce you to Nick Vujicic, a man who doesn’t feel sorry for himself despite the cards that he was dealt, he was born without arms or legs. I was so inspired by his energy and passion for life that I had to share his story. Trust me you will be inspired today!

Much love,

Franka

We would love to hear from you about your thoughts about feeling good enough.

How have you dealt when these feelings have threatened to overwhelm you?

Share it with others in the comments below, your journey may be a blessing to someone else who needs encouragement!